' underneath an onion '
for love poured from a cloud's skin
souls drenched like a rainforest
wet clothes set beings afire
so green was the yellow leaf
earthy sensualities
the impulse of a caress
fondled by a gentle wave
every craving grain of sand
from behind the freckles peeked
winter suns and summer moons
each wrinkle a narrative
voicing an ode,lament,song
the mind peeled an onion *
skin after skin after skin
searching for elusive truths
existing somewhere beyond ..
/original/z.g.
*
[the notion of 'peeling an onion' can be referred to-
1Sri Ramakrishna Paramhansa~Precepts (1836-1886)
2Gunter Grass's Peeling the Onion / memoir
3Ruth Gordon Peeling the Onion: An Anthology of Poems
4Peeling the Onion - Wendy Orr
5Peeling the Onion; Poems of Spiritual Awakening: George, E James
& possibly more] (-lines 3,4,7 &15-edited/april18.09 /-
-further ED - peek & peels > peeked -peeled -april19.09 )
coz the green leaves r green..
PHOTOsynthesis `~[click the flame]
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27 comments:
This is wonderful....Our skin tells our story, to be sure. To get through the layers, like peeling an onion, can be difficult and emotional.
There is such beauty and wisdom in your words. Thank you.
Love poured from cloud's skin..
Awesome line..
frenzied entropies
And please do visit the Poetry Train being run each Monday!
Hi Zoya--
This is another beauty--
I loved the last lines about the mind peeling like an onion...and that process is infinite.
Thank you again--thanks too for answering my question on your last OSI entry--made me quit worrying...
You got me loving the skin I am in ... I really like the way you peeled this.
A see skin like the outer circle of a mandala, here, beginning to peel it away to find the true self.
Beautiful and thoughtful.
Multi layered poem. I like it.
I love this poem!
Indra
thumbnail's sun jewels
jitter after each heartbeat:
dust devils of arcs
I like the various ways you've used the idea of skin, but I particularly like the lines "from behind the freckles peek
winter suns and summer moons."
Wow, impressive Zoya. Love your take on this prompt. G
Wrinkles telling the story. . .wonderful. You had so many wonderful lines that I find it difficult to choose my favorite. Love the onion peeling references.
i like the last stanza with the onion metaphor and your corresponding description
Life is but a bowl of onions... this is a great piece, layer after layer and lovely word after lovely word.
Deborah Godin said...
" Hi, just leaving a comment for the OSI prompt skin - you know I always enjoy what you write, but this weeks poems are just extraordinary! Lovely deep words, thank you1"
January 4, 2009 9:41 AM
wonderful!
that is so beautiful, it has a peacefulness, love the first line
This is just beautiful Zoya! I have missed your wonderful words.
Thank you for your visit. I have been missing in action and need to get back to OSI!
Happy 2009.
encapsulating.....skin after skin after skin!
cheers to 2009
Love the visualness of your third stanza...
ann
Simply lovely writing- perceptive and deliciously visual
..deeply thankful to all of u..
What fabulous imagery.
there is more to peeling an onion than tears... beautiful...
an evocative, lovely poem ... peace, JP/deb
zoya, so glad to hear from you! Happy New Year 2009! Your metaphor "like a gentle wave fondling
every craving grain of sand/" is exquisite! I should get bak to OSI... :)
The entire thing is fantastic, my favorite part though was "each wrinkle a narrative
voicing an ode,lament,song"
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..namastey!~