In bleak light his flickering eyes
kick through the smoke
watchful legs appraise
the carpet of death beneath
my brain speaks the gibberish
of the kids back home
the taste of 'what if'
a bubblegum of thoughts
in my mouth
his nose can hear the footsteps
of death
my ears can smell the warning
in his bark
hark hark
the explosion
within
a flame,a candle
what dog handler
could handle
hollowed by a landmine
was a dog's grave
/original/z.g.
[reads an epitaph story
a dog's life
ends in glory-ED]
kick through the smoke
watchful legs appraise
the carpet of death beneath
my brain speaks the gibberish
of the kids back home
the taste of 'what if'
a bubblegum of thoughts
in my mouth
his nose can hear the footsteps
of death
my ears can smell the warning
in his bark
hark hark
the explosion
within
a flame,a candle
what dog handler
could handle
hollowed by a landmine
was a dog's grave
/original/z.g.
[reads an epitaph story
a dog's life
ends in glory-ED]
This is a haunting narrative! I feel for that pup.
ReplyDeleteWriting in Faith: Poems
This is indeed a haunting narrative and you tell it so well, blending the senses - 'flickering eyes/kick through the smoke' and 'his nose can hear the footsteps of death' - and then the horror of discovering what the 'carpet of death was'.
ReplyDeleteA very unsual take on the prompt. I loved the title and feel the horror too.
ReplyDeleteYou have such a wonderful and unique assoication with words! Again I spent way too much time enjoying them.
ReplyDelete'Sandy Carlrson'-ur sane voice monitors"the line of insanity in sanity"!thank U!
ReplyDelete'Watermaid' -thank U!
'Gautami Tripathy'-thanks!
'Teri C'-thank you.u do tell ur canvas i like the blue,but i don't like the purple!the latter equally matters.u'll say that to me too when the trust comes.i hope it does!
well done, excellent words, excellent moment.
ReplyDeleteOh, I agree - Haunting piece! Nicely done...
ReplyDeleteAmazing work. I can read so many things into this personally. I really like the line 'the taste of what if a bubblegum of thoughts in my mouth'
ReplyDeleteHi. I have been taking my time wandering through the poems this week because I am on vacation. I find this poem so sad, and, as the others have said, there is horror in it. Do dogs fear death? They say you can only fear what you know. But dogs and all animals experience terror, which implies, to me, that they know death. They recognize it coming — there are so many anecdotes of that happening.
ReplyDeleteI prefer to read more upbeat poetry yet I find that I am somehow comforted by poetry like this because then I know that I am not alone in my fears. So this is very powerful for me.
I wrote a rather long and windy response to your great comment at OSI. I was going to e-mail it to you but I'm afraid I can't find our e-mail address! So I hope you go read it. Perhaps we can get a forum going on this topic so that everybody sees it and can add to it.
Thank you — Andree
http://meeyauw-pad.blogspot.com/2008/04/one-single-impression-glory.html
Sorry: I meant to write that I couldn't find YOUR e-mail address. I know "our" address!
ReplyDeletezg, beautiful but horrific poem! Have had trouble clicking back to youfrom my blog. Would never "avoid" you! Please forgive me if you felt that way! Thanks for visiting. Come back and give a real message to the alien... :D
ReplyDeleteWow, what handler indeed could manage such an emotional state and reality. Indeed you speak the truth! Such an insight into the prompt.
ReplyDeletethe teach >many thanks ma'm.horrible is never too far from horrific.
ReplyDelete"Have had trouble clicking back to you ..from my blog."HOPE and pray google is listening.thanks again..
..Quiet Paths..as always,a loud thank u!
hmmm, amazing that you caught the glorious life/death of a dog with such emotion..
ReplyDeleteIt is very haunting, reading the eyes of a dying companion. I have not been able to forget the fear in my best friends eyes as she searched my own for help and comfort.
ReplyDeleteThis brought it all back to me. Her eyes never left mine, to the very end.
A deeply moving piece. Very personal, Thanks.
Hi zoya - if you miss the http:// off the beginning of your URL when leaving comments - people won't find you - your full URL is
ReplyDeletehttp://horizonnext.blogspot.com
..Welcome!sir,
ReplyDeletei've made the desired correction in the "URL" entry..[feel so embarassed,could exchange it for
"capital"punishment]..piacere..{ps>it's my firm belief though that the fallen needn't hide,they must rise,i'm proud when people find me!regards..]