Tuesday, September 22, 2009

fog.osi

fogs hollywood


leafless branches and twigs
craft out a sign language
delicate fingerwork
weaves patterns into the mist
the autumn lexicon
articulates loneliness
the wind voices that story
a smoke without fire
descends upon a city
of burnt desires
a cloud understands
the fall of spirits
renounces the sky
and settles on the earth ..

/ original / z.g.

" Fog has a mystical feeling.
Like the heavens have come down
to envelop the world and soften it "
~ Lisa at Greenbow
( excerpt from her cmnt at sandy carlson's poem for this prompt )


[ Ed -
Lines 1 to 6 - Rearranged
Line 3 - that delicate fingerwork
Line 7 -the wind voices their story
Line 13 - renouncing the sky
Line 14 - settles on the earth ]
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8 comments:

  1. mingusSeptember 22, 2009 at 12:46 AM

    nice one! ''a smoke without fire
    descends upon a city
    of burnt desires''

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousSeptember 22, 2009 at 7:20 AM

    very nice one Zoya!

    you looked at the hollywood the right way..

    ReplyDelete
  3. zoya gautamSeptember 22, 2009 at 1:28 PM

    .. many thanks ..

    ReplyDelete
  4. Tumblewords:September 22, 2009 at 4:21 PM

    Exquisite!

    ReplyDelete
  5. SandyCarlsonSeptember 22, 2009 at 4:55 PM

    I have traipsed through that city of burnt desires. Your description is magical.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Amias (ljm and liquidplastic)September 23, 2009 at 7:34 AM

    Creatively wonderful!

    "the autumn lexicon" --- you represented it very well in this poem.

    ReplyDelete
  7. gabrielleSeptember 25, 2009 at 4:01 PM

    "a smoke without fire". to smolder still with memories. the cloud descending is a blessing.

    ReplyDelete
  8. sgreerpittOctober 2, 2009 at 11:59 AM

    so many powerful images. I particularly like the idea of fog as a cloud that has renounced the sky! I like too your use of imagry that deals with communication -- both sign language and voice.

    ReplyDelete

..namastey!~

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